Empty Spaces
by Prusso-HetalianAddict
Summary: "He always knew. He knew everything about her. Even knew she'd pined after the ghost of a man who would become as if he never were. He even knew she would always have a few holes in her heart, missing pieces that would always belong to N. But he didn't mind. Because he knew just as well as she knew; he would always be there, filling in those empty spaces." Rated M for safety.


**Hi, readers! This is my very first Pokemon fanfiction and I'm very excited to put it up. Please read on, and I hope you enjoy! Constructive criticism is always welcome, as it is a means of improvement.**

**I do not own Pokemon; all credits go to the brilliant mind that is Satoshi Tajiri. So, with that being said, let's get started!**

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_Sometimes the best thing you can do is_

_Not think..._

_Not wonder... N__ot imagine..._

_Not obsess._

_ Just breathe __and have faith_

_That everything will work out for the best._

* * *

She was fueled: full of energy, running on adrenaline, in midst of the thrills battling always had to offer her. She was flustered: heart pounding, fists clenching, blood rushing, cheeks flushed; this wasn't just any battle- No, this wasn't against just _any_ trainer. She was aware: eyes darting around, clenched fists trembling; knowing at any moment she could just _fail and lose _-her trembling hand reached for another one, _last one_ that she could send out as her other hand recalled her fainted Pokemon. She was dreading- Yes, she had some trepidation as she boisterously barked her next command; one that could decide the fate of the battle.

She was victorious. Then she is surprised; he's caught her off guard, for he is lamenting. Then she's in full out shock and she just doesn't know what to say as Ghetsis rants, and she feels this sudden, odd sense of a protective rage and she just doesn't know where it comes from. Lapiz Lazulli meets Emeralds and the same sense of protective rage disappears for just a mere second, before engulfing her completely. And then she knows why, and the new found knowledge makes her nervous.

She is always nervous as of late and she hates the sudden sick feeling causing her stomach to clench. It's foreshadowing something that she dreads to even think about when it's all over, and suddenly she's cast away into another battle, and just doesn't have to actually think about it for the moment.

This battle isn't as troublesome as the last and now she stands back, watching as Ghetsis is put into cuffs and taken away. Now she thinks about it. And Hilda knows... She knows it just as well as she knows the feeling of victory. She so surely knows, that it's almost as if it's already happened.

And N seems to know something as well as he lingers after offering Hilda his most sincere gratitude. The sincerity isn't what surprises her, no she's all too used to seeing how naively sincere this man is through previous communication. What surprises her is how he leans forward and closes his eyes, as if to hang on to the moment for just a bit longer. And then he's gone.

And Hilda just knows that their paths will never cross again... Even if he's not as certain.

It's been two weeks since then; since she saved the world. And she doesn't think- no, refuses to think about it, about _him._ Instead she focuses on training. Her best friend wants the help, and she's willing to offer it. It'd be selfish not to after earning the title of Unova's Hero.

_**He can feel it. Hilbert can feel the rush of joy as his chest swells with pride for his Pokemon. He throws up his fist high into the air, light-headed with the sensation of accomplishing his life-long dream. And when his eyes meet hers, his grin seems to grow even brighter; something that Hilda hadn't thought was possible at that moment. Her eyes are shining. They dazzle him and he feels even more light-headed, her pride over his victory painting such a lovely expression on her sharp features, that Hilbert almost thinks he's finally seen something even more beautiful than the fire that grows in her eyes when she's in mid-battle.**_

**That was amazing,**_** she exclaims as she comes rushing down from her seat in the stadium. And he knows that she means it, because Hilda's never been the type of person to give out compliments lightly, especially not of the caliber of her follow up one. **_**You're champion; Hilbert, my best friend... The Champion of Unova! That was the best battle I've ever seen. But I'm not surprised you've won. You earned it, Bert. **

But that was almost a year ago, and she isn't the same Hilda after that.

It starts out slowly. First she has a few dreams, nothing too serious, just fluff stuff that makes her want to groan and smack herself upside the head. Flying in the skies, holding hands, secretive smiles, the whole nine-G-Rated-yards. Then the dreams turn to unspoken words through heated stares, going back to the night she'd defeated team Plasma and everything they stood for. Only this time, instead of just a lingering thanks, it becomes a farewell between to lovers; his lips aren't just a few inches away, they're covering hers and she's kissing him back. She wakes up in tears.

She seeks solace in her oblivious friends: helping Cheren with his new gym, running errands for the Professor with Bianca, battling Hilbert here and there just to keep things fun as the poor guy rarely gets any challengers. They're the little things, but they're distracting and so she keeps the charade up, complying with all requests and keeping up her unbreakable facade. Hilda could never let them know about her slowly-crumbling heart...

But suddenly all these little things aren't enough and thoughts of N come rushing right back into her determined little mind. Dreams turn to nightmares and nightmares turn to restless nights. Hilbert's been begging her for weeks now, _Come on, just come to the premier It'll be fun! You're Unova's Hero, just give the paparazzi one night to make some money off of you. We'll walk down the red carpet together. We'll take 'em by storm like we always do, Hilda!_

She gives in. And Hilda finds she sort of enjoys the fame she'd been rejecting since that night ten months ago. Not because she enjoys the attention, but because the attention suddenly gives her new things to do like little parties to attend, charities to tend to, projects to start up. But retelling her story on morning shows becomes too painful as she tries her best to keep from going into detail of... of _him. _So she takes on more projects, more premiers, and even stars in a couple of movies. Anything to keep from retelling that story time and time again. And to her luck, the media eats it all up!

But the constant projects become too hard to handle with so many sleepless nights, and even dense Hilbert is starting to take notice of her increasing despair. She ignores the worried glances from her friends, though, and keeps on. It's getting too painful. By this point she can't even bring herself to even think his name. She avoids ferriswheels and eventually avoids any theme parks all together, simply because it makes her think of ferriswheels and then of _him. _

And sure enough, as the year closes and her birthday hits, her friends celebrate by retelling all her accomplishments. Including her battle against N. While it's endearing and sweet because they do it at a surprise party thrown by Hilbert, it also hurts and thoughts of N rudely break through the little lock she had set up to keep him away during the day and make life bearable.

_So she leaves for another adventure. He questions her motives, because Hilbert isn't as blind as Hilda believes. She tells Hilbert it's her turn to live out her dreams, to be champion. Hilbert is confused as to why she can't just battle him. She's already earned her badges a year ago and she could easily beat the Elite Four... **But this way we can both be current champions, silly. Besides, I've already made enough of a name over here for myself. Time to go make myself known somewhere else.** He smiles and accepts her response as is, because he realizes Unova's become far too suffocating for her to breathe. But really its the constant reminder of Team Plasma's defeat, her reason for fame; the reminder of N. And she leaves for Kalos. Except she grows too lonely after a few months. **  
**_

_Hilbert seems exasperated when she shows up at his door. But she's already earned almost all her badges, she's proven that she can go on a journey of her own, without Hilbert. Or Cheren and Bianca as well of course. Besides, hasn't he missed her? _

_**Of course, you dummy, **he insists with a small frown and a pout. **But if you just came back so that you could hang out with me, you should've just called to tell me.** Her eyes flashed and he could tell she was hurt.  
_

**_What, so you could talk me out of it?_**_ She sounded angry._

**_No, you idiot... So I could travel with you to cheer you on like you did for me._**

_So they set off back to Kalos. And this time she takes her time, relishing in the fact that he's always with her. And when he hears her cries from her nightmares that she still can't get rid of, he doesn't ask. He just lays next to her, out beneath the stars and rubs her arms gently after wrapping his around her. And she finds the nightmares slowly go away._

_He helps her train and she finds her way to Victory. But that feeling of Victory as Hilbert smiles and runs down to the congratulate the new Kalos Champion is nostalgic... And for a moment she sees N's face. She cries. And suddenly, Hilbert's not quite sure how to comfort his friend. He's trying to put the puzzle together. Hilbert wants answers._

_So they go back. Hilda refuses to talk. Hilbert's getting desperate. Her nightmares come back and she has to spend her nights at Hilbert's place. It helps... But she's ashamed, because as she looks through her tear filled eyes into his, she can tell he's hurting too. Her pain became his pain, and she wasn't sure when it had happen. But it needed to stop. Hilda couldn't keep going back to him to fill the gaping holes in her chest. It wasn't right. So she left the next morning without a single word and never came back into contact with him. Her life becomes a cycle of partying, hosting award shows, even modeling -something she discovers she's quite good at. _

Then it happens. As she's walking through the crowded, lit up city streets of Castelia to get to her new apartment, she sees a flash of green. And she's frozen. Her eyes widen and her jaw slackens... But he's not there. No N in sight. Maybe it was just the billboard announcement of some Coordinator Couple in Hoenn. But she could have sworn she'd seen... Him. She was going crazy.

And she flies back to her home town. It starts to pour, but Hilda doesn't even seem to notice as she stands outside a familiar door, soaked in her party dress and suddenly furious with her self. There had never been no 'I love you's, no undying love confession through heart-felt looks, or blazing kisses or searing touches. There had never been any substance of something between her and N for her or for him to have gained any real feelings from. Why had she deluded herself to ever think otherwise?

She'd set herself through agony and over what? Nothing, what-so-ever. Was she lonely? Did she just simply want to be loved and to know the feeling of loving someone else? Well that was absolutely ridiculous, she thought furiously as her fist beat wildly at the door in front of her. The door opens and Hilda's hand nearly knocks into his face. _It's absolutely ridiculous when I've had this waiting here for me loyally for years._

To say Hilbert was surprised was an understatement. One moment he was sleeping peacefully, holding his world -his beautiful, broken world, right there in his arms... Then the next, she was gone. Years flew by without a trace of the blue-eyed beauty left behind. Well that wasn't true. She was always there. She was everywhere. She was in every morning headline, she was on the magazines showcasing the latest fashion, she was at charities, she was at parties. She was in Castellia. But she was nowhere near him. Even when he'd been right there.

Yet suddenly she was here, years later, as if out of thin air, banging on his door in the pouring rain and drenched to the bone in that little black dressed that clung to her skin and hugged her figure tightly from the rain. And that beautifully, full, pink skin was suddenly on him, pushing firmly and impatiently, awaiting some kind of response as she held on tightly to the collar of his shirt.

He stood there motionless for a few passing milliseconds. Her fists loosened and let go his shirt. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pushed her lips against his a bit more harsh. And then he was kissing her back. He was kissing her fiercely and with a type of fire he never knew he possessed. He took steps forward and pressed her carelessly against the door, and she didn't seem to appreciate his roughness.

He didn't really care. She squirmed and his hands that he'd unconsciously placed on her shoulders when he pushed her to the door slid down against the wet material of her dress and came to their new destination, placed firmly on her hips. And his dominance had been asserted, so she gave in to his control and when his hands moved to grip firmly at her thighs, her feet lifted from the floor and wrapped around his waist and he helped her lift herself up.

She found that he didn't care that much for wet clothes, and he found that she didn't very much appreciate being more vulnerable than him. His lips were intoxicating and his body above hers in his bed almost suffocated her, but she realized that she didn't mind it one bit. He was so quickly addicted to all the sounds she made, to every breath she took, every sigh, every gasp, everything. And the sweet noises she would make when he'd nip at the little sweet spot on her collarbone... They drove each other to their edges.

And by the end of it all, she knew. And she knew it when she woke up, sore, exposed, and warm in his arms. She knew it then, too. She knew just as well as she knew that his hair looked like a mess in the mornings and that he had this one stubborn, little cowlick that just wouldn't go away unless he used his hat to cover it. She knew it as well as she knew he had a little scar on the little crevice between his right hand thumb and his index finger. She knew it as well as she knew the number of steps it took to get from his room to her room in her home.

She knew it as well as she knew the name N. She knew it as well as she knew now that a little part of her would always belong to the green-haired mystery. And as he opened his eyes and met her eyes in a soft gaze; as his lips curved up into a gentle, genuine half smile and his thumb gently caressed her bottom lip... She knew just as well as he'd known his whole life since the day they first met.

He knew. He always knew. He knew everything about her. Even knew she'd pined after the ghost of a man who would become as if he never were. He even knew she would always have a few holes in her heart, missing pieces that would always belong to N. But he didn't mind. Because he knew just as well as she knew; he would always be there, filling in those empty spaces.

And as Hilda smiled down gently at the little bundle of blue cradled gently in her arms, with Hilbert smiling softly beside her, Hilda knew that even though some part of her would always whisper "what if..."

But that didn't matter, because Hilbert would be enough. It was always Hilbert she went back to, and it was always Hilbert she was meant to fall in love with. Everything worked out in the end, and both she and Hilbert knew that they only thing that they would ever love more than each other... Was that little boy cradled in Hilda's arms.

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**So that was it, I'm sorry if any of you got confused along the way! I feel like a lot of parts may have been vague, but maybe I'm just not comfortable with this style of writing? I wanted to try something new and I figured, hey, new fanfiction category, new style! Yeeeeahhh! Noo? We'll see!**

**Please let me know what you all think. I might come up with a companion story for this and make as much of it as I can in N's point of view. Or I'll just add it on to this story as another chapter. **

**Thanks for reading!**

**x Prusso-HetalianAddict**


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